Imagine your partner suddenly proposing polyamory. Both of you would be open to any romantic relationship. Few would accept such a radical idea.
Modern heroine’s mother never wanted an open marriage, but her husband forced her into one. He’s getting a bitter boomerang instead of freedom.
A woman named ThrowAway_chosen posted her family story on Reddit, eliciting many responses. She began her post by introducing her parents to familiarize readers with their background.
The woman wrote that her parents married young. Their parents married them. Her grandfather set up a business for her dad in a big city, and they moved here soon after her birth.
Her mother was raised in a conservative southern town to be a submissive wife. Even after moving to the city, she rarely socialized. Her mom never went out and had no friends, the OP recalls. The OP’s dad only supported the family. He never married the woman’s mother or fathered her because he was always on business.
The woman says her mother was lonely often. The OP’s dad was wealthy, so the family was always well-off. She was her mother’s best friend growing up. They talked about everything, she recalls.
She encouraged her mother to socialize and find hobbies. Her mother went to a nearby park and made her first friend, a gym trainer, after years of pushing. Her friend and daughter convinced her to join the gym.
Though her mom met more people there and started having a social life, she still told her everything, the woman said.
She believes her dad’s new secretary gave him the idea, but he asked his wife for a “open marriage” one day. He told her his marriage wasn’t working and she wasn’t giving him what he wanted. She writes, “My mom was mortified and cried when she told me about the proposal. I suggested she divorce, but she said she didn’t believe in it and wouldn’t end their marriage.
As her dad pushed, she knew where this would lead if her mom agreed. Both her friend and the OP convinced her. After some hesitation, the OP’s mom agreed to be completely transparent with each other.
The woman continues, “My dad was a middle-aged (41) man with a belly and my mom (39) was an athletic woman who worked out regularly. By the way, I’m 22. What made my dad blind and what he expected is unknown. I helped my mom create online dating profiles almost six months ago.”
Her mother started dating after getting an insane number of matches, choosing from them, and chatting with them for months. All this attention boosted her confidence and made her look better.
The woman said her dad dated his secretary immediately. He’s had little success with women. Her mom told him all her dates as part of their transparency. The woman’s dad yelled at her mom for something minor a few weeks ago. Her mom usually apologized, but she didn’t with her newfound confidence.
Recent weeks have been filled with fights, according to the OP. Her dad starts fights by making fun of her mom’s clothes and appearance. He almost slandered her mother but stopped. Her mother said he tried to talk about ending their “open marriage” but she rejected it. Now she thinks they’ll break up.
The woman concludes, “My dad was never there for either of us, but the thought of my parents splitting up still feels weird. I don’t feel sorry for my dad, but I wish he devoted himself to family. But I’m happy for my mom.”